Slinky Takes a Bath
by woodybuzzmiles
Summary: Slinky refuses to take a bath, much to Woody's frustration and irritation.
One afternoon, Woody's wall clock chimes 1:00. Woody pointed to it.

"Slinky, looks like it's that time of week again: bath time." Woody declared.

Slinky's jaw drops.

Woody says, "Come on, let's go get the water started." Slinky just stands there. "You're gonna have to get in that tub, Slink. Now, Slinky, we can do this the hard way, or the easy way, or the medium way. Or the semi medium easy-hard way. Or the sort-of-hard, with a touch of awkward-easy difficult challenging way." Still no response. "So that's how you wanna play it, huh?"

Later, Woody tries fetching Slinky a ball. "Slinky, look at this new toy. FETCH!" Woody shouted. Slinky goes after it, but the ball goes back, leaving Woody confused. He looks at the box and he reads, "New Boomerang Pet Ball—really works." Woody gets annoyed and tosses it away. He angrily walks forward, but the box strikes his head.

Later, Woody comes up to Slinky with a bomb strapped to his outfit. " **SLINKY! THERE'S A BOMB STRAPPED TO MY CHEST AND IT'S GOING TO EXPLODE IT 3 SECONDS UNLESS YOU TAKE A BATH!** "

Then he calmly asked, "Please?" The bomb explodes leaving Woody covered in soot. In another try, he says "I am now going to assault your mind with these subliminal messages." He imagines pictures of a bathtub, running water, and soap. He even imagines a goofy freckled girl, who giggles. Woody realizes his mistake. "I'm sorry that you had to see that." Woody's phone rings and picks up the receiver. "Hello, fancy French restaurant? I got a naughty dog here who won't take a bath." He hears the person's indecipherable voice. "What? Could you say that again?" He asked. "Slow down, it's like you're speaking some other language." He furiously slams the phone.

Next, Woody tries "leap-frogging" Slinky to the tub. "Hey Slink, how 'bout some leapfrog?" He hops over Slinky . "Okay, your turn." Slink climbs onto Woody's back. He thrusts Woody off his back. Slinky hits the wall with a THUD! On the wall, Slinky is lying on the ground, with his spring all out of wack. Later, he's in bandages.

"Hey, Slinky, how about some leapfrog?" Woody said. Slinky hits him in the head with his cane. "Ow!" Woody said in pain. Next, Woody shows Slinky a dollar. "I got a crisp $1 bill for the next fella to take a bath in this home!

Hamm, riding in a bathtub, takes the dollar, and rides off. Sometime later, Woody tries dancing, but fails. He pants, sweat dropping from his eyebrow. "That didn't work either, eh Slinky?" Woody asked.

It is now 1:40. Woody comes up to Slinky, dressed as a pirate cowboy. 'Slinky, Slinky, Slinky! Look what I found. It's an old pirate treasure map, revealing the location of buried pirate treasure in this very house. C'mon, let's find it. All right, boy, 40 paces to the left. 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6,…" After so many counts, he arrives at a door with a red X. "….24, 25, 26, twenty-seven," He looks around. "…40. The treasure must be in here!" He goes into the bathroom, and finds a bathtub painted like a chest. "Wow, Slinky, look, a pirate treasure chest." "Is that the bathtub?" Slinky asked. "Why no, Slink, this Isn't the bathtub. It's treasure, and look. Dubloons. " Woody said, showing two soap bars. "Don't drop 'em. Whoa! Will you look at this broach!" He said, showing a rubber duck.  
Slinky barked. The cowboy rips off his disguise and angrily said, "I do not know what dogs don't want with valuable broaches! Now why don't you just get in this tub?" Woody sees that his dog is still not going in. "Get in the tub! Get in the tub! Get in the tub! In the tub. Woody yelled, "IN THE TUB!" Slinky still doesn't listen. "Now, Slinky, are you going to get in this tub or am I gonna have to….?" Woody said, starting to get frustrated. He gets launched up through the ceiling, then to his bedroom ceiling and Slinky grasps the rafters. Woody looks down. Woody's hands slip off, and he started to fall. "AAAAAHHHHHHHH!" Woody screams. He lands in the tub with a BIG SPLASH! "All right, Slinky, you have duped/frustrated me for the last time. So, if I can't get you to come to the bath, I'll just have to bring the bath to YOU. He goes outside and gets a 37-foot long hose. And fills it up with water. Woody said in a singsong voice, "Bath delivery, Slinky." He starts spraying, but Slinky dodges it. After so many sprays, Slinky sneaks up to a tree.

When Woody climbs up he could see that there's a dog-shaped figure. It's time for you to clean up your act." He sprays it extra hard making a lost Robo-Dog fizz and break. "Oh, no." Woody said worriedly. "I accidentally bathed Slinky to hard and removed his skin."

Woody hears Slinky happily barking and carrying the ladder to the other side. "Slinky!" Woody lividly said, balling fists. "Bring that ladder back this instant!" Slinky and Woody get into a brief argument. "I am really not amused, Slinky. You are going to take a bath,and you're going to get clean right now." Slinky asked, "Are you the boss of me?" "I am so the boss of you, and it may be a free country, but you live in my house under my rules. Also you will do what I say when I say." Slinky reaches a puddle of brown goop. "What do you think you're doing? I am talking to you little mister. Don't you dare go into that mud puddle." Ignoring Woody, Slinky sets a foot over the mud. While scolding, Woody accidentally slips and he falls into the mud with a SPLAT! "I'm a dirty man."

Later at home, Woody is taking a bath. Woody gets annoyed and says, "Yes, yes, Slinky, I'm getting behind my ears." Slinky smiles.


End file.
